Little Johnny gets an F in math

Most people didnโ€™t enjoy math in schoolโ€”numbers, fractions, and percentages arenโ€™t exactly easy. Little Johnny was no exception, and his poor multiplication skills got him into trouble.

He came home and told his dad, โ€œI got an F in math today.โ€
His dad asked, โ€œWhat happened?โ€
Johnny explained, โ€œThe teacher asked, โ€˜Whatโ€™s 3 times 2?โ€™ I said 6.โ€
His dad replied, โ€œThatโ€™s correct.โ€
Johnny continued, โ€œThen she asked, โ€˜Whatโ€™s 2 times 3?โ€™โ€
His dad shouted, โ€œWhatโ€™s the difference?โ€
Johnny grinned, โ€œThatโ€™s what I said!โ€

Another joke: A manโ€™s morning habit of loud, smelly farts annoyed his wife. She warned him that one day heโ€™d blow his guts out.

One Thanksgiving, she stuffed turkey innards into his underwear while he slept. Later, he ran to the bathroom in horror. When he finally came downstairs, he whispered, โ€œHoney, you were rightโ€ฆ but with Vaseline and two fingers, I think I got them all back in.โ€


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